Tag Archives: Glee Recap

…Watch Glee

21 Sep

… Mother fucking duh! I’m almost slightly embarrassed to spend five hundred words dispelling why straight men don’t watch Glee.

Glee is Back!

How would my good friend Dr. Suess put it? If you watch this show on FOX, you do not want any BOX.

Is it the fact that it’s a fucking #musical? Sure, why not.

Maybe because over half the characters are either homosexual or played by homosexuals? Yes, that could be it.

It could be because the agenda is laid on so thick, even str8 bois have a hard time taking it seriously? Yeah, that’s one, too.

Maybe, just maybe it’s because Lea Michele is SO annoying she cancels any hotness factor the show may actually have... BINGO, Sherlock!

No matter how you slice it, no one who watches Glee wants to get some pussy fresh box later that night. Nothing screams I want fairy tail quite like watching this fairy tale.

Glee is the epitome of Gay TV for the 21st Century. Like Project Runway six years before it, it was the guiltiest of guilty pleasures for str8 bros and the guys who they were letting kiss it on the side. No one was allowed to know they watched Glee together just like no one was allowed to know he occasionally liked a finger up the rectum. Snitches get stitches!

But somewhere along the way, things started to change. People started to admit they watched this show. Just the other day, my brother set his Tivo for a season pass of Glee! GLEE! This is a man with a girlfriend and who doesn’t exhibit any other straight men don’t quality… and he’s watching Glee.

Puck

We admit it. This is the Only reason we agreed to watch this show...

I’m sorry to get personal, but I was flabbergasted. Downright floored. I had to move him from a firm five on the Kinsey to a flimsy four. He’s one #Tom Cruise haircut away from

strapping on assless chaps and singing It’s Raining Men at ‘Ladies Night’.

We’ve laid out the reasons why Glee isn’t an appropriate show for straight bros to watch. In fact, if you’re sitting next a straight bro and Kurt Hummel comes sashaying on screen to deliver yet another song from Gypsy or Caberet, just turn to your left and give that boi a kiss. We all know the two of you would both rather be doing the deed than watching the show, so don’t pretend. He won’t either.

It’s quite simple, actually. Straight men don’t watch Glee. Or at the very least, they don’t admit it.